in search of weird similes

[tamaranth]

Dear British Readers
I'm trying to come up with fun and unusual alternatives, ideally with a London / Estuary feel, for 'like moths to a flame' and 'all over him like a cheap suit'. Ideas?
(Normally I'd just let this ferment in the back of my head but I want to free up the brainspace for something else!)

Comments

[d-floorlandmine.livejournal.com]

All over him like liquor on eels? [giggle]

Drawn "like fake tan to a footballer's wife"

[tamaranth.livejournal.com]

Oooh yeah. I like the way you think!

[d-floorlandmine.livejournal.com]

All over him like lambrini on a white stiletto?

Bad similes are a speciality - I often have to explain IT concepts to non-technical people. [grin]

[uitlander]

It's hard to beat the lambrini comment, but what about drawn to her like toms to a Queen, or dogs to shit, both phrases I learnt whilst growing up in London.

[marypcb.livejournal.com]

i assume 'like Burberry to chavs' would *not* be acceptable?