That privilege meme
Thursday, January 3rd, 2008 06:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tamaranthI've seen this all over, and every time I read another take on it I notice something -- some assumption, some omission -- that I haven't noticed before. So ...
This blog-game is based on an exercise developed by Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, Stacy Ploskonka at Illinois State University as reported by Quaker and Social Class. The exercise developers hold the copyright and ask that if you participate in this blog game, you acknowledge their copyright. Quaker and Social Class is requesting that if you post this in your blog, please leave a comment on their post about it.
Stuff that's true for me is in bold.
* Father went to college
* Father finished college
No, my father left home and went straight into the Royal Navy. (This was at the end of WWII: he was French: he wanted to escape the family home.) He did think education important, though, and continued to be enthusiastic about learning until the Parkinsons hit.
* Mother went to college
* Mother finished college
My mother was the illegitimate daughter of a baker: after her father died she was emotionally abused, and left home as soon as possible. (Again, this was WWII: she worked in the NAAFI and dated Canadian pilots.) She did go to grammar school -- some scholarship -- but hated it, and didn't do well.
* Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor.
Nope. Well, that said, I don't really know much about what my father's family are doing now.
* Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers
I remember my sociology teacher at sixth form asking each of us to define our social class. "Working class," I said. "What does your father do?" "He's a maintenance engineer." "You mean he sits at a desk and --" "I mean he comes home with oil and tar on his hands."
* Had more than 50 books in your childhood home
* Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
I never counted them (and didn't, when I first saw this meme, include my own: I had a couple of hundred by the time I left home). I'm fairly sure, though, that between the books on shelves, the books in boxes and the books all over the place, we had 500 or more.
That said, new books -- bought in a shop -- were a luxury and a treat. I used to buy the occasional paperback in W H Smith in my teens: this was Extravagant. We went to all the local jumble sales (it was what we did on Saturday afternoons) and I clearly remember handing over 70p for a big box of SF paperbacks, on the basis that my father and I would both read them and therefore it was Economical.
* Were read children's books by a parent
I suppose I must have been: can't remember. My parents used to tell everyone that they taught me to read as early as possible so that they could read in peace. I was a member of the local library by the age of 5.
* Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
* Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
I assume this means extra-curricular lessons, e.g. not standard school stuff. I'm including the village guitar class, which I attended for 8 years without making very much progress (it was all about chords), mostly because it was something to do. And I'm including the village judo club, which I attended for about six months, but stopped because I was getting bullied.
* The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
When they're not portrayed as demented old bats surrounded by half-feral kitties.
* Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
Nobody had credit cards back then. Even when I was at university it was extremely rare. My father had a Barclaycard with a £200 limit, but I think that was only after I'd left home.
* Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
* Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
Not really applicable in the UK at the time I went to college (university). I qualified for a grant that covered my tuition fees, and the majority of my accommodation and living expenses. My parents were supposed to pay a minimal contribution (I think it was £46 per term) but didn't, as I had already left home and my mother was Making A Point. But yes, in principle: I did not have to pay for my university education.
* Went to a private high school
No, to the local comprehensive. I hated and feared it, and recently have realised that sending me there was a conscious decision by my parents: they didn't want me to be a snob.
* Went to summer camp
We didn't have those. Or if we did, I had no knowledge of them. And I wouldn't have been allowed / enabled to go.
* Had a private tutor before you turned 18
No. Luckily, I was academically gifted.
* Family vacations involved staying at hotels
This is one of the questions I blanked on. No, we didn't stay in hotels. Simple enough ... but only half the story, because we didn't really have family holidays. Our 'holiday' -- when my parents took me out of school for a week, because the school permitted a child to have a week's absence for holiday -- was spent at home, going to the local beach every day and generally enjoying summer. I can only remember one occasion when my parents and I went away together: we visited my aunts in France.
* Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
Almost all of my clothing came from jumble sales -- with hilarious consequences in a small village where everyone recognised L's yellow jeans or C's green coat. Another disadvantage of being small! I got the castoffs of my classmates ...
* Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
My parents never bought or gave me a car. If I'd stayed at home, my father might've done up a car for me.
* There was original art in your house when you were a child
Only in the sense of 'stuff I made'.
* Had a phone in your room before you turned 18
We didn't have a phone line. The nearest phone was half a mile away: the next nearest a mile and a half. I remember one winter when the nearby phonebox was out of order and I battled through snowdrifts to reach the one at Gardner's Corner. After I'd left home and my mother had died, my father fell in a ditch on the way back from that phone box, and subsequently contracted pneumonia.
* You and your family lived in a single family house
Yes.
* Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
No. (They had the chance to buy the place for £1000, cheap even in the early 1980s, even for an isolated cottage with no road / phone line / gas / mains sewerage: but my mother thought it would be a burden.)
* You had your own room as a child
Yes. I was an only child.
* Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course
No. The only equivalent I can think of is the 11-plus, which I wasn't allowed to take.
* Had your own TV in your room in High School
No. I did at one point buy a TV at a jumble sale, but was not allowed to keep it in my room in case I watched it after bedtime.
* Owned a mutual fund or IRA in High School or College
No. I had no money at all except pocket money / student grant / D(H)SS benefits until I started work: I wasn't given money as presents and nobody ever left me money in their wills.
* Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
Yes, I flew to France several times (the Southend to Le Touquet was pretty cheap; not much more than a train ticket to Plymouth) to see aunts / cousins. I think 'flying on commercial airline' is more common in the UK than the US.
* Went on a cruise with your family
* Went on more than one cruise with your family
No. See above re holidays / vacations.
* Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up
Lots of museums -- well, mostly the South Kensington ones again and again! My father liked the Science Museum (and the Maritime Museum at Greenwich); my mother preferred the Natural History Museum. I don't remember any art galleries.
* You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family
I didn't know figures -- but then, I had no idea how little my father earnt until I saw the application forms for my university grant. I do know that many family arguments came down to money: when I stopped eating margarine, I was told off for expecting butter, which was more expensive. (I didn't want butter either. The idea of either made me feel quite ill.) And I was certainly encouraged to save energy by closing doors, putting on an extra sweater (I remember doing my homework in fingerless gloves) and so on.
Thing is, few of the above factors made me feel underprivileged. I did feel underprivileged by things like my mother telling me off ("you did it on purpose!") instead of being sympathetic / taking me to the doctor when an exploding cherryade bottle sliced my knee open. By going on a school trip and having the teachers ask me why I was wearing 'smart' shoes and not trainers, and being too embarrassed to say that I didn't own a pair of trainers. By going to the first wedding I remember attending (I was about 14) and having to wear a hat that my mother had made for me, because everyone wore hats to weddings as far as she was concerned. By not having 'official' school uniform because my parents refused to buy it from the 'official' shop.
But that's all relative. And there were others in the same boat.
This blog-game is based on an exercise developed by Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, Stacy Ploskonka at Illinois State University as reported by Quaker and Social Class. The exercise developers hold the copyright and ask that if you participate in this blog game, you acknowledge their copyright. Quaker and Social Class is requesting that if you post this in your blog, please leave a comment on their post about it.
Stuff that's true for me is in bold.
* Father went to college
* Father finished college
No, my father left home and went straight into the Royal Navy. (This was at the end of WWII: he was French: he wanted to escape the family home.) He did think education important, though, and continued to be enthusiastic about learning until the Parkinsons hit.
* Mother went to college
* Mother finished college
My mother was the illegitimate daughter of a baker: after her father died she was emotionally abused, and left home as soon as possible. (Again, this was WWII: she worked in the NAAFI and dated Canadian pilots.) She did go to grammar school -- some scholarship -- but hated it, and didn't do well.
* Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor.
Nope. Well, that said, I don't really know much about what my father's family are doing now.
* Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers
I remember my sociology teacher at sixth form asking each of us to define our social class. "Working class," I said. "What does your father do?" "He's a maintenance engineer." "You mean he sits at a desk and --" "I mean he comes home with oil and tar on his hands."
* Had more than 50 books in your childhood home
* Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
I never counted them (and didn't, when I first saw this meme, include my own: I had a couple of hundred by the time I left home). I'm fairly sure, though, that between the books on shelves, the books in boxes and the books all over the place, we had 500 or more.
That said, new books -- bought in a shop -- were a luxury and a treat. I used to buy the occasional paperback in W H Smith in my teens: this was Extravagant. We went to all the local jumble sales (it was what we did on Saturday afternoons) and I clearly remember handing over 70p for a big box of SF paperbacks, on the basis that my father and I would both read them and therefore it was Economical.
* Were read children's books by a parent
I suppose I must have been: can't remember. My parents used to tell everyone that they taught me to read as early as possible so that they could read in peace. I was a member of the local library by the age of 5.
* Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
* Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
I assume this means extra-curricular lessons, e.g. not standard school stuff. I'm including the village guitar class, which I attended for 8 years without making very much progress (it was all about chords), mostly because it was something to do. And I'm including the village judo club, which I attended for about six months, but stopped because I was getting bullied.
* The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
When they're not portrayed as demented old bats surrounded by half-feral kitties.
* Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
Nobody had credit cards back then. Even when I was at university it was extremely rare. My father had a Barclaycard with a £200 limit, but I think that was only after I'd left home.
* Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
* Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
Not really applicable in the UK at the time I went to college (university). I qualified for a grant that covered my tuition fees, and the majority of my accommodation and living expenses. My parents were supposed to pay a minimal contribution (I think it was £46 per term) but didn't, as I had already left home and my mother was Making A Point. But yes, in principle: I did not have to pay for my university education.
* Went to a private high school
No, to the local comprehensive. I hated and feared it, and recently have realised that sending me there was a conscious decision by my parents: they didn't want me to be a snob.
* Went to summer camp
We didn't have those. Or if we did, I had no knowledge of them. And I wouldn't have been allowed / enabled to go.
* Had a private tutor before you turned 18
No. Luckily, I was academically gifted.
* Family vacations involved staying at hotels
This is one of the questions I blanked on. No, we didn't stay in hotels. Simple enough ... but only half the story, because we didn't really have family holidays. Our 'holiday' -- when my parents took me out of school for a week, because the school permitted a child to have a week's absence for holiday -- was spent at home, going to the local beach every day and generally enjoying summer. I can only remember one occasion when my parents and I went away together: we visited my aunts in France.
* Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
Almost all of my clothing came from jumble sales -- with hilarious consequences in a small village where everyone recognised L's yellow jeans or C's green coat. Another disadvantage of being small! I got the castoffs of my classmates ...
* Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
My parents never bought or gave me a car. If I'd stayed at home, my father might've done up a car for me.
* There was original art in your house when you were a child
Only in the sense of 'stuff I made'.
* Had a phone in your room before you turned 18
We didn't have a phone line. The nearest phone was half a mile away: the next nearest a mile and a half. I remember one winter when the nearby phonebox was out of order and I battled through snowdrifts to reach the one at Gardner's Corner. After I'd left home and my mother had died, my father fell in a ditch on the way back from that phone box, and subsequently contracted pneumonia.
* You and your family lived in a single family house
Yes.
* Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
No. (They had the chance to buy the place for £1000, cheap even in the early 1980s, even for an isolated cottage with no road / phone line / gas / mains sewerage: but my mother thought it would be a burden.)
* You had your own room as a child
Yes. I was an only child.
* Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course
No. The only equivalent I can think of is the 11-plus, which I wasn't allowed to take.
* Had your own TV in your room in High School
No. I did at one point buy a TV at a jumble sale, but was not allowed to keep it in my room in case I watched it after bedtime.
* Owned a mutual fund or IRA in High School or College
No. I had no money at all except pocket money / student grant / D(H)SS benefits until I started work: I wasn't given money as presents and nobody ever left me money in their wills.
* Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
Yes, I flew to France several times (the Southend to Le Touquet was pretty cheap; not much more than a train ticket to Plymouth) to see aunts / cousins. I think 'flying on commercial airline' is more common in the UK than the US.
* Went on a cruise with your family
* Went on more than one cruise with your family
No. See above re holidays / vacations.
* Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up
Lots of museums -- well, mostly the South Kensington ones again and again! My father liked the Science Museum (and the Maritime Museum at Greenwich); my mother preferred the Natural History Museum. I don't remember any art galleries.
* You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family
I didn't know figures -- but then, I had no idea how little my father earnt until I saw the application forms for my university grant. I do know that many family arguments came down to money: when I stopped eating margarine, I was told off for expecting butter, which was more expensive. (I didn't want butter either. The idea of either made me feel quite ill.) And I was certainly encouraged to save energy by closing doors, putting on an extra sweater (I remember doing my homework in fingerless gloves) and so on.
Thing is, few of the above factors made me feel underprivileged. I did feel underprivileged by things like my mother telling me off ("you did it on purpose!") instead of being sympathetic / taking me to the doctor when an exploding cherryade bottle sliced my knee open. By going on a school trip and having the teachers ask me why I was wearing 'smart' shoes and not trainers, and being too embarrassed to say that I didn't own a pair of trainers. By going to the first wedding I remember attending (I was about 14) and having to wear a hat that my mother had made for me, because everyone wore hats to weddings as far as she was concerned. By not having 'official' school uniform because my parents refused to buy it from the 'official' shop.
But that's all relative. And there were others in the same boat.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: Thursday, January 3rd, 2008 07:37 pm (UTC)The phone thing -- what an inconvenience (and an apparently life-threatening one, at that). Quite a contrast to this age of cell phones.
I am quite loving this meme. So wonderful to find out a bit more about so many friends.
no subject
Date: Thursday, January 3rd, 2008 08:14 pm (UTC)